Imagine that your wife comes home one day and she’s got on an ugly dress. You’re about to say that it doesn’t look that great when she says something like
“Look at this new dress I bought. I think it really goes well with those earrings. What do you think?”
Are you going to say: “Oh well honey I think the dress is hideous, thanks for asking for my opinion though.”?
Or are you going to say “Oh… yeah it’s great” Most people think that the latter is more appealing and that’s what they would choose. Did you know that the average person lies 4 times per day and is lied to 200 times per day? That’s 88,000 lies in a lifetime and 4,453,000 times you’re lied to. The average college student in America is telling a lie an amazing 50% of the time he or she is talking to his or her mother.

In the Bible the 9th commandment is “Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour” In other words don’t lie. Did Jesus have a point? Maybe the world is the corrupt place it is due to the extensive amount of lies told each day. But surely some lies are ok, like the example I used. Are you supposed to hurt a person’s feelings by lying to them? I’m not saying you have to be mendacious just for the hell of it. I’m saying lying is only ok if by telling the truth you are hurting someone else. Equivocating, or using ambiguity to confuse someone is just the same as the bad type of lying. I believe that this is actually worse as you are confusing the person, making it more sinful, if you believe in that.

When a child lies is it the same as a fully grown adult lying? I think that there are several points that need to be discussed here. Firstly is the child lying because they don’t want to get into trouble or is there another reason. A child can lie compulsively if they are in fear of getting into trouble. They may have not done anything at all but lie any way as it is a habit and they know that some things that they do will get them into trouble. I don’t believe this type of lying needs to be punished severely. If a child is in this sort of problem then the problem needs to be handled and fixed. Once a child grows to a certain age, the innocence is gone and a lie is the bad type.

well, there is the jewish saying "Life before all" which would imply that lying, in order to save a life is justifiable

I don't automatically believe lying is wrong, and I don't automatically believe telling the truth is right. The motives behind our actions should be a factor in determining whether they're right or wrong.

What if you told a lie to save the life of an innocent person? What if telling the truth caused them to be murdered?

It's not just the action, it the motive behind the action.

It is never Ok to lie. even if your girl friend asks you, "do I look fat in this?". You still do not have to lie, you can be evasive. For example, "Well, I think you would look better in something else." You do not have to hurt a person's feelings, but you can be less direct, yet maintain your integrity.

Thanks for your responses.

I was once on Oprah some years ago on women who get asked out vs. those who don't and the topic of "game playing" came up. Oprah was deadset against them and then I shared story of couple who had been married 60 years and it was the time when the husband was about to be put on a morphine drip for terminal cancer. At the point the wife rubbed his wrist and said: "I have a confession to make. I lied to you for 63 years. I was crazy about you sexually, but I never told you, because I knew you liked the chase."

He reach over and touched her wrist with his eyes watering, he smiled and said: "That is one of the things I love you for."

Was she a liar or a very wise woman who knew how to keep her husband happy?

Oprah changed her answer.

When you are lying for something good

Never lie! The only time it might be okay to not lie but re-direct the focus is if your significant other asks: "Do I look fat in this?" Even then you could say something like: "You don't look fat, but it's not as flattering as some of your other outfits."