Are our girlfriends our true soul mates and men just the penis?

I'd agree that men often act like selfish idiots. Just as women sometimes behave in ways that make men crazy. And when it comes to a painful breakup, there's plenty of hurt to go around, so people tend to act in pretty bizarre ways.

One thing that occurred to me, though, when I read your story, is that women have each other to console them after a nasty breakup. I can't say that's true for men. Men rarely confide in each other. Most men internalize their emotions. They lack the verbal facility to express emotions, especially painful ones. If I were to guess how a man would deal with an intense breakup, I'd guess one of the following: a) head to the gym for an extra intense workout; b) head to the bar for a round of serious drinking; c) hit the road and drive like a maniac. None of these behaviors are particular healthy, and what's worse is that many men combine the last two into a potentially lethal mix.

So, girls, next time you are consoling each other for your woes, take a moment to grieve for the men in your lives who are so hemmed in that they cannot give voice to the emotions buried within.

I tried to hold it in, but your title was too much. I couldn't help but laugh out loud. I know many women who have thought the very same thing. Men and women are wired differently in the brain. Love's struggle is simply to see eye-to-eye.

The timing of your post is interesting to me because my girlfriends and I have been relying on each other more than usual lately. I've found that the same advice I'm giving Denise about one guy is the same advice that Brooke is giving me about another guy, which I basically ignored in favor of Keisha's advice who was calm and even one day, but then called me the next day, frantic and stressed out about whether she should call her guy or ignore him or....... (what-the-fu$%-is-it-all-for?!?!?!?)

Brooke and I decided that she and I both equate the fulfillment of desire with happiness. We keep looking outside ourselves for a lasting stimulus. Yesterday, we decided that it's really kinda tragic how many women base happiness on something that's so fleeting. We're determined to base happiness on more renewable resources like the feeling you get after watching a sunset rather than the feeling you get after having sex.

Sometimes, I feel that chics would fare much better without the pricks. But then, they're good for some things aren't they?

Betty, I love your post! And it really made me think hard about my relationship with women as opposed to men.
I wondered about women and our emotions and how we can sometimes act in crazy ways.
Then I pondered is it just because Crazy #1 really gets Crazy #2? I used to be offended by the term crazy, but now I see its man code for 'emotional'... what's a girl supposed to do we have a lot of estrogen? We get hormonal.

One of the best things I ever heard was when our Sexpert Jen Sincero said she had two friends that were going through sex changes, one was a male going female and one a female going male. Once they started taking the appropriate hormones, the man felt like an emotional wreck and the girl wanted sex all the time.

So there you have it, from the mouths of maybe the only people who can truely understand what its like to be both sexes!

"(what-the-fu$%-is-it-all-for?!?!?!?)" -Amanda

This is such a good question. What is it all for? I read a quote once that said, "Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't." Sometimes we ask our girlfriends unnecessary questions. We have to ask our girls before we call, break up, make up, and so much more. It's taken me a while to come to the conclusion that I don't need to ask my friends about EVERYTHING. I already have to tools I need to make my OWN decisions. I just have to listen to my heart. Now I choose to just talk to my friends with the constant should I or should I not question. I've found that it's brought me closer to them.

I think that if men have such a hard time opening to one other then perhaps they should invest more time into friendships with women. You're right, men do often act like selfish idiots. But they don't just act that way towards women, they act that way to each other as well. I think it's hard for a man to truly open up to his guy friends without the fear of them judging his masculinity.

I just think that women are easier to talk to about certain subjects, relationships being one of them.

Then perhaps the lesson we can all learn from this is that both and men and women need to break any barriers that prevent them from being able to share things with one another.

Men, talk to your woman about things that are bothering you. Ask her all your questions.

Women, talk to your man about your doubts, fears, suspicions, and desires. Because at the end of the day, your girls can't answer your questions. Only he can.

After reading all of these post I've come to this conclusion...while our girlfriends can offer us emotional support in tough times...the decent men that are in our lives can offer us emotional security which "EVERY" women both needs and desires.

There are just something's we get from our girlfriends and something's we get from our boyfriends/husbands.

We can't be all things to all people. We're just not created that way.

Except who we are and our differences and get what you can get from both the sexes.

That's my take.

~Consultelaine