The big danger is "de-compensation"--when reality doesn't match fantasy. We've all experienced this ourselves. I know when my dreams have been disappointed I can feel like I've dropped into a dark pit. Imagine what this can be like for people without your emotional and professional and social resources... when the fantasy a person has designed his whole life around falls apart. (This, again, was a sign that this man was a stalker: he had already made travel arrangements to spend time with me in Los Angeles, and he was putting his house up for sale in another state. He imagined our relationship was real and that I had encouraged all of this through our psychic connection.) De-compensation is where things get unpredictable and potentially dangerous to the stalker, the target, and the other passengers.

I can't help but think of how "The Secret" and "The Law of Attraction" feeds and validates this kind of obsession: focus on what you want, see it, believe it, and the universe will bring it back to you. He would think of me, then get my e-zine a few minutes later and believe it was a sign that I was responding to him directly. (I know this is a distortion of the LOA, but that's what this disorder does--it distorts.)

I look at all this and think of how often I've visualized what I wanted, found signs from the universe, had conversations with entities that weren't really there (like my "money honey"), or fantasized obsessively about someone (like an ex-boyfriend). I don't think it's a clear "us" vs "them" in mental health. I think there's a level of self-awareness of your fantasy life that separates divine inspiration from delusion. I know money isn't really speaking to me, or the universe, or the Goddess. I pretend they're speaking to me because I use their voices to access my own courage and wisdom. Perhaps this is the difference between an MLK or a Ghandi and a Joan of Ark or a George W. Bush.

Ultimately the cruise was great. Carnival had my guy's psychological profile, Security kept tabs on us and checked in with me daily, I was surrounded with friends who understood the situation. I set a strong intention the night before the cruise (and I cast a couple of kick ass spells) to release this man and myself from his obsession, and for him to find health, happiness, and true love without me. I found my stalker respected my request for no contact for almost the entire cruise, and it looked like he even had a good time on his own.

It was a big relief when the profiler told me that it wasn't my fault--that I hadn't done anything to cause or deserve this weird situation. It seems to be part of my path to attract clients, friends, and personal experiences that educate me on mental health. Every disorder I encounter seems to be just an extension of what healthy people do to an unhealthy extreme. I don't know what the big picture purpose of this education may be, but I value learning how very human we all are.