Resolution: debt begone, the hard way

Admittedly, as a canine in the world of human financing, I tend not to fret over the mundane details of the everyday, such as mortgages, investments, insurance, or even a salary. However, given my unquenchable desire for more treats, and particularly an expensive type of indulgence known as pizzles (thank you, bulls, for making the ultimate sacrifice), I have managed to accrue some debt in my time. True, it's paid by my ever-loyal minion, who pretends she's superior, thanks to the whole "earning a living" thing, but it's still my expense, and the thought of its weight can be heavy on little, furry shoulders.

"Pay off more debt" is such a familiar refrain in terms of New Year's resolutions, that I yawn just dictating this. It's like losing weight, or finally getting rid of that deadbeat lover that you swore you were going to ditch last year (hint: unless he/she makes a dinner worth swooning over, cut the fat already). But this year, paying off those bloated credit card balances seems particularly important, as our once shiny-bright economy quickly goes from lackluster to cruddy-edged faster than a penny in a glass of Coke.

So, the first step? In my humble opinion -- which is rarely humble, so take advantage of this spectacularly unusual situation -- it may be time to eat fewer pizzles, if you know what I mean. If I had ever taken a math class, I could trot out some numbers, but the concept seems fairly straightforward: stop spending so much money. You know what I'm talking about, you feel the truth of that down in the gut, or more accurately, around the backside of the gut, where the wallet resides.

Alas, what of the halcyon days of unlimited pizzles? Are they lost forever in the haze of misty nostalgia, akin to remembering the family grouped around the radio, freaking out over "War of theWorlds"? Nah. First of all, most of us can't even remember when we didn't have cable television, and secondly, everything goes in cycles. Look at your weight, or your love life. The economy is no different -- lean, fat, lean. The pizzles will come again, but for now, it's a lousy time to accrue more debt and a fabulous time to shift your venti vanilla latte Starbucks expenditures toward Citibank or Chase, and whittle away your credit card balances. And, when you find yourself with extra funding, simply buy some treats, and send them to me.