“What an ugly bush!” whispered my friend as she looked beyond my perfectly manicured rose garden. “I know” I retorted, “I hate that thing and I’ve been trying to convince our neighbors to cut it down” The “ugly” bush in question was a nondescript scraggly tree that had taken up residence on the neighbor’s side of my fence, close enough to my rose garden to irritate me. Even the arborist who visited didn’t know what it was, commenting that it appeared to be a weed that had blown in from the nearby hills.

I am a gardener and I love plants, however that bush or brush or whatever the heck it was bothered me to no end.  Our neighbors are terrific people so naturally I didn’t want to cause any problems. “Perhaps a flowering dogwood, or a watermelon colored crepe myrtle would look great in that area,”  I suggested, promising to incur all the costs and perform the work .

They were not interested in having me replant. Even though the bush was an acre away from their house, they felt it was established while anything new would take a couple of years to grow. One day they announced they were being transferred to Texas. Since they were moving, I thought for sure they’d agree to a transplant.

“No we don’t want to replace it because a new tree may lower our house value,” was their response. “It’s so UGLY, though” I retorted. Our neighbors sold their home at a premium price and we were genuinely sad to see them go. It was a relief to find that the new owners were friendly and fun, yet I didn’t have the heart to ask them about replacing the irritating bush until we knew them better. 

What was the solution to my ongoing angst?

There is an old saying, “If you can’t lick them, join them!”  Instead of focusing on what I didn’t like, I decided to revel in the loveliness of my garden.. I set out birdfeeders, birdbaths and fountains to invite feathered friends to frolic and I added benches to contemplate the views while I inhaled the luscious fragrances of the blossoms. While I was meditating in the rose garden one bright sunny morning, I heard the most beautiful chirping. From where is the melody emanating, I thought to myself as I scanned the horizon.  Small golden birds were happily bathing in the running waters of the gurgling fountain while a dozen or so were feasting at the feeders. Surely these were not the songbirds.

As I slowly strolled through the flower beds, my eyes settled on a most glorious site. The ugly bush was bustling with hundreds of yellow finches darting to and from my garden. The once homely shrub had evolved into a majestic domicile for warblers! What once was an offensive unsightly invasive plant had transformed into a habitat of colossal splendor. Instead of wanting to rid the garden of the beast, I now welcomed the beauty.

The dainty yellow finches glittered from the branches like the brightest ornaments on a twinkling Christmas tree singing carols analogous to angels.. What grandeur to behold!

There is a lesson in every impediment. As Saint Antoine de Saint-Exupery wrote, “what is essential is invisible to the eye.”   Sometimes we get so set in our judgments that we fail to recognize the redemption in the situation. We believe that the other person is wrong and that we are right. “If he would only change everything would be better” we lament. We fail to understand that nothing changes until we change.  Whatever we focus on becomes stronger, it is only when we surrender the control that wonder is allowed to enter our consciousness.

As I write this from my home office today, I have a perfect view to the fountain, the feeders, and the yellow finch tree. How blessed I am that I listened with new ears, and looked with new eyes. The yellow finch tree has opened my heart and reminded me that though we may be ugly ducklings on first glance, we possess an inner swan. What is essential is invisible to the eye! Ugly is beauty turned inside out. Rejoice and be glad!

 Cynthia Brian is a radio personality, life coach, speaker and  the New York Times best selling author of Chicken Soup for the Gardener’s Soul, Be the Star You Are!, The Business of Show Business, and Miracle Moments®. You’ll find her singing with the finches as she gardens. Visit www.star-style,com or call 925-377-STAR.