A lot of times someone rubs us the wrong way and ruffle our feathers but instead of approaching the individual and demanding respect, we find ourself added to that person's collection of people they can walk over. I first learned to practive assertiveness while attending an anger management class. No anger issues here, I am an Instructor and teach a stress mgmt. class so I figure I could learn from anger management. As I soon learned people who get walked over do carry anger but unhealthy anger because they keep it bottled up. I soon learned how to speak my mind free of any guilt of saying whatever it was I would say. Today I had to practice this skill again with someone I work closely with. I had really tried getting to this point until I discovered how sabotogical she is. I was nervous at first but afterwards I could breathe a sigh of relief because she now knew I will stand my ground and do so very firmly. I believe no one should have to always hold their tongue in order to be a peace keeper. Speak and you will find people respect you more. No, it isn't easy to do at first and I am still growing at it, but just to be able to speak your mind withour regrets, is very refreshing. Quit holding your tongue. Say what you mean and mean what you say.