Looking Back to the Future

A couple of days ago I posted some advice, "Get Ready for the New Year: Write Your Own Eulogy or Obituary!", to the Soul Searching area of the PeopleBelive Channel. In light of some comments that I received about this particular exercise, I'd like to repeat what I contributed as "advice" to my blog and elaborate a bit further about the practical significance of this exercise as we all get ready to celebrate the coming of 2008.

First, here's what I said in my Advice column:

Imagine that you have died and put yourself in the position of having to write your own obituary for the local newspaper. What would you say? In other words, how do you want to be remembered? What are the most important things that you experienced in your life? Alternatively, write your own eulogy, which will be recited at your funeral. Did you live and work in such a way that the last comments about you are really what you want to have said?

Are you now living and working with meaning? Assuming that someone else does write your eulogy (or obituary), what would be different about it from what you have written in the above exercise? Remember Scrooge's experience in the classic tale, "A Christmas Carol?" What would your encounter with the Ghost of Christmas Future, in which you get a glimpse of your destiny, be like? How would people remember you, talk about you? Regardless of your faith-based orientation, there is an important life lesson here, so stick with me! As you get ready and plan for the New Year, please reflect upon the things that really matter--the things that, ultimately, will comprise your life's "legacy."

Now, please note that writing one's obituary or eulogy is NOT intended to be a game! On the contrary, this kind of "soul searching" or self-reflection is especially important during the holiday season AND as we prepare for the "New Year!" One of the meaning-centered principles introduced in my book, Prisoners of Our Thoughts, is called “Detect the Meaning of Life’s Moments.” In other words, only you (generically-speaking) can answer for your own life by detecting the meaning at any given moment and assuming responsibility for weaving your unique tapestry of existence.

On a practical level, I include more information about writing an obituary and eulogy in my book and even include a template for writing a eulogy (all you have to do is fill in the blanks!). For your reference, here is the link to my book on Amazon.com: http://www.amazon.com/Prisoners-Our-Thoughts-Principles-Discovering/dp/1576754065/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2/002-4534362-5325643?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1187834303&sr=1-2

The goal of this exercise is to help us remain mindful of what is really important in our lives as we make plans for the future as well as reflect upon our past. As a result, I hope that the exercise also will help everyone commit authentically to values and goals that allow them to live with meaning BEFORE the need for an obituary or eulogy becomes necessary! Metaphorically-speaking, as Jack Nickolson quipped in the movie, As Good As it Gets, “You only have so many shopping days left until Christmas!”

I hope that this additional information is helpful. I want especially to thank Amanda for stimulating more discussion about this life-affirming topic. Let me close with a saying that I found on a bumper sticker not too long ago that seems a propo: “Be the kind of person that your dog thinks you are!” Even if you are not a dog lover or owner, I do hope that the underlying message of this bumper sticker is clear. In short, I’m trying to encourage you to enrich your lives by reflecting upon your death. As strange as this may seem (actually, this philosophical principle has deep spiritual roots in antiquity), I hope that this “advice” is taken seriously and provokes some meaningful thought before it does become “too late.”

Happy New Year!

Alex

(c) 2007 Alex Pattakos, Ph.D.