How can you tell if you are too needy? Imagine you are one of the people who deals with you regularly and how they would rate you in the following ways on a 1 to 3 scale (1 = not at all; 2 = sometimes; 3 = almost always).

1. Do you whine?
2. Do you complain?
3. Do you come off like a victim?
4. Do you feel sorry for yourself?
5. Do you want people to feel sorry for you?
6. Do you act deeply hurt when something doesn't go your way?
7. Do you cry, when something doesn't go your way?
8. Do you attempt to make them feel guilty?
9. Do you seem like a bottomless pit?
10. Do you make them want to avoid you?
11. Do you make them feel like screaming at you: "Toughen up!"
12. Do you make them root against you?

Scores:

• 12 = low maintenance a.k.a. you're welcome
• 13-24 = medium maintenance a.k.a. you're wearing out your welcome
• 25-36 = high maintenance a.k.a. you're unwelcome

What's a needy person to do? Become aware that the more needy you act, the worse your life will be and the more people will treat you poorly. Realize that just because you feel needy, doesn't mean you have to act needy.